The World Has Turned and Left Me Here
Well, here’s briefly what happened, and hopefully this will be all I say about it.
Since she got out of school, Bonnie’s been panicking about the rest of her life and her inability to relax has been driving me insane. In the past couple months, it’s become increasingly obvious that she is extremely unhappy. Last night was normal enough, we played air hockey at the arcade, grabbed dinner, and watched last week’s episode of Lost. We made plans to hang out the next day, and dinner plans for next weekend when both of us were off for an evening. I could tell something wasn’t right, though. Before she left, I brought up how bummed she has been recently and how it bothered me that I couldn’t make her any happier.
I’m not particularly happy with a lot of aspects of my life, but Bonnie was the one part of it that I consistently enjoyed. I basically told her “I’m not always in the best mood, but you keep me happy. If I can’t do the same for you, then what’s the point?” She started to cry, and I said “For at least the past several weeks, it’s felt like you’ve wanted to break up with me, but you haven’t had the heart to tell me to my face.” She whimpered “I didn’t want to hurt you”.
I knew what was happening, so without saying anything else, I stood, grabbed my car keys, and took her back to her car in total silence. We sat there for a second and I said “…so that’s that? Five years?” She looked over and said “…yeah, I guess so.” At that point I started to tear up, she choked out a “Goodbye”, and left my car, tears streaming down her face. I sat in the parking lot for a while in total disbelief, then for whatever reason my body decided to make me throw up the last dinner I had with her.
The next day, the reality of it still hasn’t set in. Bonnie has been a huge part of my life for nearly 1/5 of it. She was the most important thing in the world to me, and suddenly being placed in a position where that person no longer requires my care and affection has my mind reeling.
Today’s forecast:
March 29th, 2006 at 3:15 pm
Now that Bonnie’s out of the way… *eyes ZHX with a seducing look*
March 30th, 2006 at 9:59 pm
Wow, dude. REALLY sorry to hear that. At least I understand why you’ve been ignoring me on AIM the past few days. Hang in there.
April 3rd, 2006 at 7:15 pm
Yo man sorry to hear the news. But (I hope this doesn’t sound too lame) Time heals all wounds.
April 10th, 2006 at 7:20 am
Damn, dude. I know how you feel. Sarah and I broke up after only a year and I was fucking crushed. I didn’t know what to do with myself. I can only imagine the pain you went/are going/will go through…
April 21st, 2006 at 3:51 am
Jesus christ, enough with the sympathy. You need to be looking at this not as an ending, but as an opportunity… to become a career alcoholic or flip out at a republican convention. Optimism is the key here Bill. And besides all that, what the fuck am I going to read at 4:51 in the morning if you stop posting your random lamer 1337 H4X0r RTFM posts noob? AND, I didn’t want to tell you this while the two of you were together, but Bonnie drove a Hummer, voted for Bush and had a penis. I know that might be inappropriate for posting but apparently A LOT of people are driving those fucking things now.