Funny Interaction with my Dad
I love my dad to death. In many ways, he is one of the funniest, most creative people I know, and in our own ways, we’re actually a lot alike (we’re both having a pretty good laugh over those crazy answering machine messages), but we definitely do not see eye to eye on a lot of things.
For example, we butted heads several years ago when I joined American Atheists and the newsletter started coming to the house. It was “embarrassing” according to him, and while he generally didn’t interfere with my receiving of the newsletter, re-subscription notices were often thrown away, and once the quarterly journal (more magazine-like than the newsletter) had to be fished out of the garbage as well. He claimed it was an accident. More recently, any discussions of skepticism are shot down with comments like “why do you care so much?” and the purchase of books related to the subject declared “wastes of money”.
Even longer ago, he got sucked up into the whole “magnet” fad, and praised the benefits of putting magnet-laced insoles in his work boots (nevermind that he would have probably achieved the same results with normal, padded insoles). Even at this young, gullible age (I was in junior high I think), I remember thinking “waitaminnut…what the hell would MAGNETS do for the human body?” And my books are a “waste of money”…
Anyway, and this was only a couple years ago, he was having a problem with his hearing because of what he assumed to be compacted earwax. Several days later he told me he went to a doctor to have the issue resolved, and did so through the use of a burning candle placed in the ear. While it definitely sounded medieval to me, I had never heard of this practice, and just took my dad’s word for it that it was a legitimate medical procedure. I guess the idea is that the burning candle creates a vacuum in the ear canal, forcing the earwax out. Though that sounds like it might possibly work, I discovered today that this practice is used to treat even crazier symptoms, and its supporters claim it also cleans out the brain (yeah…) and the sinuses, among other things.
Anyway, I thought nothing of it until I was browsing a website I discovered today, that covers all sorts of questionable medical practices. Just randomly checking out entries in their database, I discovered the article on “ear candling” or “coning”. I wondered if it was the SAME “ear candling” that my dad had spoken of (as if it could be anything else), and the title, “Why Ear Candling is Not a Good Idea” caught my eye. The “bottom line” at the end of the article actually reads:
For most people, ear wax moves along the ear canal and eventually makes it to the outside, taking with it any accumulated dirt or other matter. Compacted ear wax should be removed by a physician or other health professional using legitimate instruments. Candling is both ineffective and dangerous.
While I was a little concerned about the actual dangers involved with ear candling (although they seem minimal), I was curious what DOCTOR in town he was going to to have this bizarre procedure performed. I also wanted to drive this “waste of money” point home a little better. He was installing new lights in his shop, and I went out to ask about it.
Dad: What’s up, kiddo?
Me: Oh, nothing.
Dad: …
Me: Hey, a couple years ago, you were saying something about that earwax problem? And that you had it removed with candles or something?
Dad: Yeah, yeah. Burning candle, pulls the wax out with air pressure.
Me: Right. I was just curious where exactly in town you had that done.
Dad: Oh, right down there at my chiropractor’s office.
(BINGO!)
Me: *Rolls eyes* Well, I was just reading online that that procedure can actually be very dangerous? Sometimes even depositing CANDLE wax into your ear? Oh and also it doesn’t work.
Dad: Well all I know is that I went in there plugged up pretty bad and the heat and pressure from the candle cleared it all out. She even showed me the results, almost made me sick. *Holds his fingers about six inches apart* Musta pulled out this much wax.
Me: What? That’s not even possible. How deep is the ear canal? An inch? How could that much stuff be…
Dad: *Assertively* Well, it worked. I’ve had it done twice.
Me: Whatever. I was just concerned because I was browsing this site that documents fringe medicine and…
Dad: Could you hand me those tubes there?
Me: *Hands him a couple boxes of florescent tubes”
Dad: These are those new tubes with the electronic ballast. No hum, no flicker. They cost less to run, they last longer…
Me: …cool.
This is a tactic my dad uses a lot when he disagrees with me called “changing the subject and talking about nothing for long enough that my annoying kid will forget what he was talking about”. He boasted the superiority of these new florescent tubes for several minutes before a break in the conversation allowed me to leave. I’ve decided his hearing problem was not from compacted earwax at all, but maybe just that his ears needed “popped”, or that the perceived “better hearing” after the coning was purely imagined. You know, if you’re paying a “doctor” whatever the fee for a coning is, I’m pretty sure you’re already under the impression that it works.
Anyway, I actually called in sick to work today (something I ate, I’m guessing), and I’m late for my bloodletting.
December 18th, 2006 at 6:40 pm
Hey wild, I was sick friday night/saturday morning (I thought something I ate) and Mallory is sick today. Pretty much the same thing. I’m pretty sure it’s nothing we ate. We all share a disease. Through our bleeding we are one.
December 19th, 2006 at 1:32 am
I like that your dad calls you “kiddo” still.
December 19th, 2006 at 9:56 pm
Ear candling is semi-legit. Better to just put some drops of olive oil in the ear for a few minutes. Do that once a day for a week or so, then water-pik the stuff out. FYourdad’sI…