Dear God, Please Let That One Guy Get Really Drunk Tonight
[Downtown, headed to the arcade for cheap beer and Gorf (or Robotron, depending on my mood). Ahead of me on the street corner, a man in a Santa suit is making out with a woman, also in full Santa gear. A happily inebriated toothless man in a SWAT hat carrying an open tallboy stops to yell at them.]
Toothless Guy with SWAT Hat and Open Beer: Hey Santa! GET A ROOM!!! Your candy cane’s showin!! HAHAHAHAHHAHA
Mr./Mrs. Claus: Uhhh…
Toothless Guy with SWAT Hat and Open Beer: Shiiiiit. [To nobody in particular] Craziest shit I ever seen!
[He matches my stride.]
Toothless Guy with SWAT Hat and Open Beer: [To me] Hey man, how’s it goin?
Me: Not bad, not bad.
Toothless Guy with SWAT Hat and Open Beer: You got a dollar for a beer, man? I’m tryin ta get drunk tonight!
[I am only carrying plastic.]
Me: Hahaha oh man…if I had ANY cash on me, I would buy you a beer.
Toothless Guy with SWAT Hat and Open Beer: Tell ya what — say a prayer for me tonight and we’ll call it good.
Me: Haha, will do.
Toothless Guy with SWAT Hat and Open Beer: You have a good new year, now.
Me: Hey, you too.
Well, a promise is a promise.
December 23rd, 2007 at 5:45 pm
I have had mormons coming by my apartment for the last three weeks, and last week I told them that I would try praying and let them know how it went. I didn’t, however, tell them what I would pray for, so thanks for giving me an idea.